Chapter 47: The Importance of Yourself: Sis, Life is A Marathon Not a Race!
After graduating this past week, the main question everyone kept asking me was, “What’s Next?” Now, while there is nothing wrong with this question for someone in a transition period, it can be pretty daunting.
And I know I can’t be the only one who has felt this way. Whether you’ve graduated, turned a new age, or have moved into a new stage of life, this question is sometimes stressful!
As a result, I wanted to dedicate our post this week to the Importance of Pacing Ourselves because, sis, life is a marathon, not a race!
If I am being transparent with you all, SLEEP is the only thing on my mind after graduating. While I have been sleeping for the past 2 ½ years, it has not been quality. I’ve been getting less than 6 hours each night and staying up to 2-3 am writing papers to maintain a good GPA.
Therefore, I have been taking these last two weeks to catch up on my Z’s, eat good food, and lounge around. Although I know reality will hit me soon, I’ve been trying my hardest to offer myself grace and pace myself as I embark on this post-grad life.
One of the first ways I’ve been trying to do so is by taking a much-needed vacation. Do you know your girl has not been away for more than 48 hours in the past 2 ½ years to leisure?
I know I’ve been neglecting myself and my well-being, so my priority is to take care of myself.
Don’t get me wrong, I am still planning in the background my next steps, but I am using my advice and taking time for myself.
Life is already hard enough. We often feel like we are against the clock, but sometimes it is essential to slow down and smell the roses.
And, this summer, ladies, that’s what I plan on doing. I plan on smelling every flower I can and enjoying the process. I know there will be challenging moments, but if I tackle them differently, it doesn’t always have to be a negative outcome.
I can only pace myself and not look at every difficult situation as the worst thing possible. And I ask that you do the same thing in your life.
Don’t go through life trying to push a clock that is not meant for you to move. This is your life journey; therefore, play by your rules, not anyone else’s.
Everyone will have an opinion on what you should do next. And some of the advice is truly helpful. But remember, outside views do not stare back at you when you look at yourself in the mirror; only you do. Therefore, make sure your next step is something you can feel content with and happy about for the time being.
And remember your next step is not your final step. You can always pivot to more fabulous things. But, in the meantime, offer yourself kindness and do what is best for you.
If it’s moving, if it’s living the soft life this summer, if it’s going back to school, if it’s opening a business, if it’s trying something you’ve never done before, do it because it makes you happy.
Think through your next steps; when you have decided, have faith that it will work out.
But most importantly, don’t let anyone rush you into a decision not meant for you. Pray on it, seek counsel, meditate on it, and make it happen when you feel good about it.
As Black women, we often have to carry the loads for so many people; why not carry just you for a moment?
What would that look like? How would it make you feel?
How would it make you feel to pace yourself for a while and not feel like you have to conquer the mountain top in one day?
And I know it’s easier said than done. But, dream for a little while. Open your journal and write it out. If you can’t do everything you write out, at least try one or two things on the list.
I dare you to take time with yourself. I dare you to give yourself the second chances you give to others, even some individuals you know don’t deserve them.
I dare you to live life like a marathon and not a race. You’re only in competition with yourself. Therefore, sis, you only have room to elevate and beat your highest score.
Maybe today’s message was a letter to myself. But I know another woman reading this may have needed this message too.
We will often get caught up in the larger plan we have made for ourselves, forgetting to let ourselves let our hair down and breathe in the process.
Today, I ask that you start allowing yourself to exhale more often.
Let us know in the comments how you will be pacing yourself next month.
Don’t forget to follow us on our social media. I will share how I will be pacing myself for the next month on Instagram, starting with my upcoming vacation.
Until next time!
Peace + Prosperity, as always!
Jadis DeShong-Venay, M.A.
I Hate Adulthood 